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Stories From the Psych Ward (2 of 3)I'm so cold I feel it down to the bones,Stories From the Psych Ward (2 of 3) by =RosaryOfSighsx
sitting in the dining hall trembling
over my cup of tea. A huge Christmas
tree twinkles merrily beside me in red, blue, silver, pink and gold.
Patients huddle together outside to talk,
but I'm forbidden to join them,
trapped inside the ward on a category four.
They're all strangers to me, I've spoken to no one.
Smoking their cigarettes in faded pajamas,
looking tired and worn down,
lips twisting into smiles as the smoke
curls down into their lungs.
Nurses find me hiding from evil spirits in the cupboard.
They let me stay inside, safe until the panic stops and
the shadows disappear, give me blankets
to stay warm, until they take me by the hand and lead me out.
Two psychiatrists come to speak with me
While insects pour from my lips
And satellites speak of the death of stars
The voices scream at me
But I talk.
They want me to trust them
They want me to stay alive.
A nurse takes six canisters of my blood,
a deep frothy red. It pours out of my
Bipolar cells, Bipolar diseaseWe all have bipolar neurons -Bipolar cells, Bipolar disease by =RosaryOfSighsx
brain cells with two processes.
Bipolar neurons process light
Some of us have bipolar disorder
where our moods chemically switch into two severe states
into mania and depression.
Sometimes we're fighting darkness
some days we're drowning in light
both are dangerous
both are debilitating
both can kill us
But we are all human.
We all have bipolar neurons and they keep us alive.
Some of us have bipolar disorder, which can lead us to suicide.
So next time you insult me for being bipolar,
remember that at a cellular level, your brain is bipolar too.
The difference is that my brain is cellularly bipolar
but it is chemically and structurally bipolar too.
Bipolar disorder needs your understanding
not your judgment.
This is a disease that brings us to our knees
this is a disease that can destroy families and lives.
This is a chemical reality that feels like a waking nightmare,
like trying to breathe inside antimatter and black holes
or feeling that euphoria, feelin
Bound and nailedBound and nailed by ~MODDEYDOO
Bound as I cannot escape...
Nailed in the knowledge
Because what I know...
Yet its beyond me to act
Its not within my Powers
I can only be patient and wait...
But I can live and let live
I'll be damned if I'm sitting
For this to restrain me further...
I am who I am
You are not gonna get me
I'm not going without a Fight...
You can stick your ugly Head out
Reaching for me
But I ain't listening...
FearClay and Michael are given anaesthetic for their shock treatment.Fear by =RosaryOfSighsx
We sit together in the lounge, and Michael asks him why
he's not wearing the blue hospital robes.
"The shock shop won't let you in without them."
Clay points at him and screams so loudly we all shake.
"I need to lie down," he whispers,
and the nurses surround him
and gently lead him away.
He's so quiet and sweet on the ward,
but for a single moment, he's terrifying.
Michael is upset, and I try to tell him that Clay's unwell,
that we're all unwell.
He was hearing voices this morning,
and staring into nothing.
And I hope he's okay,
that he'll be okay.